From a young age, women often fantasize about their wedding day, making the perfect bride as well as the prospects of motherhood. However, there have been changing attitudes with time towards the concept of marriage with many considering cohabitation as an option. Usually, the consideration in such cases is to save on rent and other costs that are significantly subsidised by living together. Despite this, most couples looking for lasting lifetime relationships usually consider marriage not only for formality but view it as a form of commitment.

A key step in making this choice is a mutual sharing or understanding of each other’s values, preferences, principles needs and desires for the future, among others. Therefore, this commitment shouldn’t be taken lightly.

Susan and John Bamurekye, who recently wedded, share a key consideration for those planning to get married. They opine that couples should seek counselling prior to this lifelong commitment.

“We are both independent thinkers and strong willed. During our counselling sessions, we realised this could become a big challenge once we got married but with the help of a counsellor, we were able to get tips on how to deal with it,” they say.

This step can also help couples assess whether they are ready for marriage. Below are some more signs to indicate readiness for marriage:

Are you both ready to take a step forward?

After a specific time of dating and you’re finally talking about starting a home, merging investments and more, it is safe to say you are both probably ready for marriage. A relationship involves two people whose common goal is to embrace each other no matter the difference, which is why every decision should be made in agreement of both parties.

There is mutual love, trust and respect

When there is genuine, intentional love between two people, it is much easier to progress in regards to marriage and commitment. Love is not materialistic, it is kind and compassionate and this you must know before saying I do.

Also, oftentimes people misinterpret trust because they only relate it to loyalty. Being able to work as a team, find solutions and be open to vulnerability is part of this. It will make marriage easier because you will have to assist each other through both the difficult and good times and overcoming such challenges will further strengthen your bond. Earnestly understand that positive encouragement is part of respect and trust. You should never demean your partner but instead, correct them or discuss any grievances with them.

You enjoy living together

Thinking about waking up next to your partner excites you, even after months of dating and living together. Are you ready to live with a snoring partner, one who doesn’t put up the toilet seat or you can’t tolerate these behaviours? It is highly recommended to spend more time with your partner before officially saying I do. This will help you know more about the person and fully adjust. If living together satisfies your heart even after some chaos, then this might be a sign you’re ready for a lifetime commitment.

You’re both excited about starting a family together

Whether it’s sooner or later, the factor of children and starting a family is an indication of marriage readiness. This is because raising children together requires a certain level of commitment and dedication to work. This includes both financial and social consideration of how you would like to raise these children.

For many, the essence of marriage is to start a family. If this is you, then this should be the measure of readiness. Anyone who wants to make it formal must have a prospective plan of the future. Sometimes, you even find yourselves discussing how the home will look like and how many children you would like to have. This is a good sign.

Finally, evaluate yourself first because it all depends on what your goals are. Is it what you want, are you ready to commit long term, do you love this person, are you ready for the better or worse? Seek some guidance from your family, friends and therapist to assess your honesty towards this decision and if the above factors are met, congratulations you can take a step forward.