Tips to attract and build lasting female friendships

One thing for sure is relationships are extremely experimental in the beginning; we try our best, learn the other person, and tap into their world, appreciate their uniqueness and accept to walk beside each other.

According to Promise Twinamukye, a journalist and advocate for wellness, friendships are inevitable and core to anyone intending to be successful and happy.

To give context I am neither a feminist nor an expert at friendships. I am just a girl who grew up around many women, many sisters and numerous girlfriends. Probably you can call me a student of experience.

And to think that we can’t exist without friendships is confound, because no man is an island. We have to try and better ourselves to attract good, quality friends who will contribute to our growth and in turn learn from us, building a community of females that fix each other’s crown,’’ she says.

Lifelong friendships are special but they don’t happen by coincidence. They are built, nurtured and expanded. Here are some tips to help you attract and maintain quality friendship;


What you give is what you get, and such is life. Naturally if you wave or smile at a stranger, there are 90% chances they will smile, wave back even when they don’t recognise you. Friendships should never be transactional, it’s the small things like being there for each other, listening, keeping a secret, a few favours etcetera. Your friends should be able to trust you when they need any kind of help and that’s how you benefit from each other and it shouldn’t be one sided.

Create room for growth and development

As we grow lots of change happens in between, marriage, children, religious awakenings, career swap and sometimes relocation. All these changes will shake relationships and for the relationship to survive there must be strong emotional connection. Usually, some people react negatively to change but for your friendship to thrive, accept that for growth to happen, change is inevitable. Cheer your girlfriend when they receive any news in the direction of growth even it means being miles away.

Be committed and intentional

Making effort to keep in touch will sustain a good relationship; it is practical knowledge to understand that no one wants to feel like they are forcing things. Show concern, a video call once in a while, a postcard or surprise flowers will do more than you can imagine.

Find a link beyond the initial attraction

The friends we make are usually from the places we have gone to, either school, church, parents of our children’s friends, work among others. Now the trick is for a friendship to last it must go beyond the place of meeting. Do you share any hobbies, interests or live in a similar neighbourhood, whatever it is ensure there is a connection beyond the origin.

Numbers lie, focus on quality friendships

Occasionally women tend to have many friends and find themselves stuck in between who is better and who is not? All friends are useful in their own way; it depends on what your priorities are. If you are trying to renew your spiritual understanding of principalities, you will definitely need church friends, if you are prioritising career or marriage, find friends who will support you to growing that particular field.

Make it a health issue

The type of friends you invite into your life will determine how healthy and happy you will be. Friends that are constantly speaking negativity will quickly lead you into depression, yet friends that encourage and comfort you will assist you into inner peace, gratitude and health growth. Female friendships are known by all means to be grounds of drama and unnecessary fights. To avoid all this drama they talk of, choose friends that are prioritising positivity and growth.


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