The journey to saying I do: Tips on succeeding
Planning a wedding is similar to putting together a puzzle; the right pieces must fit together in the right way in order to create a complete picture. Each piece of the puzzle must be carefully considered for its role in the overall scheme.
A critical question for us to get insight into is, what is the journey for most women as they prepare to say I do?
Is it just the countless hours of planning, picking a venue and finalizing the guest list, finding the perfect dress and drawing a budget? Or is it bonding with your soon to be new family, finding the right service providers or creating a timeline for most of the activities to be done.
Whatever it is, relationship coaches and teachers like Michael Todd and Kingsley Okonkwo stress that the wedding is just a ceremony. The real work to “I do” is what happens after the wedding, normally referred to as the marriage.
A discussion with two incredible women gives an insight into the most profound things we tend to take for granted.
Christine Ddembe 44 says that “70% of young ladies nowadays are focused on the glam and prestige that comes with the wedding and are least concerned about preparing for marriage, yet marriage is what is most important.”
When asked how one prepares for a marriage, she said,
“It is something as small as understanding your partner’s temperaments during this time. Weddings, regardless of whether you have money or not weddings are extremely stressful. Watch how they get through this season and use it as preparation for how you will deal with their not so good days. Make sure you discuss how you can support each other in stressful moments and how you can come together to work through difficult times.”
Furthermore, she noted: “Quite often we tend to take for granted the counselling sessions given by the church but you will be amazed how these will help you sail through some of the difficult seasons in marriage.”
Betty Atuhura, a bride to be had this to share;
“The people you surround yourself with during this time will either make or break you. She adds that quite often, those we surround ourselves with tend to be the least of our concern yet they ought to be our top priority.
She adds that during this season she has sought the counsel of wise elders and called on her friends to join her to pray and fast for both her wedding and marriage.
“My choice of maid of honour is also not to be ignored. I selected someone with way more experience than I would have loved it to be one of my friends. However, the thing with friends is that their advice can sometimes be biased. I’m glad I did because it’s been very helpful and I’m glad I trusted my instincts.”
As they summarised their experiences, they noted that the journey to “I do” requires maturity and determination. They also emphasized the importance of being open to feedback from people who have been there and succeeded. In addition, they say, it is important to be patient and take your time making decisions.